A Love Story

This is a sweet love story. My mom wrote this a couple years ago for a speech she gave in her public speaking group. It's about my Grandparents, Bob and Elaine Ruth. I am posting this because my Grandma passed away a couple weeks ago. Looking back on her life has been a joy. She was a strong woman and I was blessed to love her as my grandma. I hope you enjoy this story of a precious couple.

A Love Story

Click….click….

It was June 9^th, 1944 and the Normandy invasion was underway. By day 3 the Germans had caught on to the American’s message of clicks and were ready to respond. That was the case with Joe. He clicked and heard a response. He raised his head and a bullet ended his life.

Joe was married to Elaine, and at the age of 21, she thought her life was over.

Love Stories abound but some are made out of years of service, devotion and simply doing the right thing. WWII taught that to thousands of solders. And their stories will be brought forth for many years. This is just one of them.

Elaine was in mourning and Bob, fresh out of the Navy, went along with his mother, Ruth, to pay their respects. Bob kept returning day after day. Elaine’s three sisters finally took her by the shoulders and told her to take notice. Bob was in love with her and he was a great guy. She did take notice and they were married soon after that.

There is something special about that WWII generation. They were strong in their faith and family and knew about personal responsibility.

Bob and Elaine raised two children, Becky and Rob. I married their son, Rob. Their lives revolved around their church, schools, and baseball. Bob owned a shoe store and knew everyone in town. He worked 6 days a week and one night a week. Elaine worked part time as a secretary.

There were lots of happy years and many life struggles. He suffered a heart attack and she had breast cancer. They have many wonderful friends and neighbors, and life experiences.

We need to learn from these men, their very lives are a testimony to what they learned from the war. They valued hard work, life and liberty. For the most part the war taught them mercy and kindness and the importance of human life. This is a strong generation with great character.

Bob retired at 60 and he and Elaine traveled with family and friends, played bridge and attended many ball games.

Some of the things Bob has done over the years that made a difference in their marriage: Flowers on her birthday; a new outfit for Christmas; A pat on the behind just for heck of it and always a kiss as he went out the door.

Elaine had her role to play too. She always had dinner on the table at 6:00 and just before Bob came in the door she would comb her hair and put on fresh lipstick to meet him at the door. They paid attention to the little things.

The last five years have been the slowing down years. They have done remarkably well. Today she is 88 and he is 86.

Five years ago Elaine began to forget how to do things. Things like balancing the check book, laundry, ordering off a menu.

Bob took up the slack and few people noticed.

That’s what you do when you have loved some one for 60 years. You just do the right thing and take care of them. That is what Bob has done as Elaine has slipped further and further away.

The Doctors call it Multi-infarct dementia, repeated strokes that destroy small areas of the brain.

The last two years Bob has been the total care giver. He has learned to cook, clean house and is best friend with the banker who does the check book for him.

He has given up his men’s morning coffee group, fishing, and volunteering at the church. Now he does the grocery shopping, and dispensing of medicine.

Elaine couldn’t live at home with out Bob.

And he wouldn’t be without her.

We would say “Bob, you are a wonderful husband” His response was “Just what anyone else would do”.

Then Friday, Sept 12^th Elaine was unresponsive. At the hospital it was determined that she had suffered another mini stroke.

But this time it was different. Bob was exhausted. He finally admitted he couldn’t take care of her.

We knew it was coming, but when? When do you divide a marriage into two, after 62 years? When can you not feel guilty, when can you know you gave it your all?

Everyone has their limit. We encouraged him to seek help two years ago when her illness became evident. But Bob continued to endure, serve and sacrifice out of love.

Now it was time to take Elaine to the nursing home.

Last Wednesday morning we walked into her hospital room.

With glazed eyes she looked at Bob and gestured to an unseen person, “Would you like to meet my son?” We could see Bob's down cast face and the hurt written over his whole body. He told everyone he saw, “She doesn’t know me.”

However, this love story isn’t quite at an end. Later that day Bob was headed out of the door to run an errand. He stopped and turned and made some wise crack. He was always teasing someone, especially me. I turned to Elaine and said “Bob always makes us laugh doesn’t he?” She replied in a soft, slow, articulate way, “I thank God for his humor, his care, his love."

When Bob returned we met outside her hospital door while I relayed her message of love. We stood there embracing, crying. It was the most emotion I had ever seen from him.

He took control of himself and you could see the strength of character build in him, just like he knew he should be, just like the war and life had taught him. In his quite old voice, smiling, he said “She is quite a gal!”